Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Here Comes, No — There Goes. the Drive by Circus. They Call it Piccadilly ... Buy Your Advance Tickets and Pray ... Giggles Guaranteed!

Dilly of a drive by, now circuses can blow towns on-line, so easy.  So clean.  They can even snub sponsors, which Piccadilly Circus seems to be making an art of these dizzy days.  This flaky outfit stood up and indoor gig in Greenfield, Mass,  not even calling ahead of show time to inform sponsors  there would be no show time.  So, the carnival left town before it ever came, Peggy ...

“We didn’t know until about an hour-and-a half before the first show that they didn’t show up,” said Fred Steiner, of the Franklin County Agricultural Society in Greenfield, Mass.  So that put the town in a pickle. Oh, excuse me, I could go a pickling on.   A circus rep said the show had posted notice of the cancelled date on its website, for those who had purchased advance tickets.  A look at the website shows no  dates after mid-June. 

Circus said to have  “blamed the city” and other local municipalities for contentious issues with permits over health and safety. 

“They just blew right past us to another town.” said Steiner to the Greenfield Recorder. .  “...we heard through the grapevine.”

Another town they blew on-line was Hampton, NY, to have been played two days following the Greenfield snub.  A message under the date reads “Please choose a city below. If you bought tickets for Hampton they will be honored at any city any show time.”  How considerate; no refunds, I assume, but, yes, by all means, do show your face in one of our other arenas, and you can still pay us more  money to ride an elephant and have your sulking face painted into a clowny smile, and, yes, not to worry, we accept all credit cards!
Sample Ticketmaster review: "The performance would be ok for a carnival side show. It was way too expensive for what you got. Souvenirs and snacks were outrageously priced. Having intermission as an opportunity to make more money was tacky."  

Oh, how I LOVE that last sentence.

Now, I’m wondering who among the bottom feeder big tops might have blown this town, but, no, I’m not going there.  Only to glance a bit: Website shows a  Sarasota address.  There you go again, Circus City.  Once, home to big top kings; now a hide-out point for fly-by-night shills.

I’m pickling off for something more legit.

END RINGERS: Meet the newly matriculated Christian Stoinev, clever equilibrist and dog trainer, having landed, last year, a  degree at ISU in Broadcast Journalism, by golly!   And already, the guy is broadcasting like a journalist:  “When people hear circus,” Christian told NBC, “they think about carnival ...’Circus’ doesn’t have a well-respected image but circus made me who I am today, took me in college and put me in a national spotlight.”  And, might I inquire, Christian, along the way did you lift moppets onto and off revenue ponies? ... There’s your answer. 

... Christian is on a campaign to “raise the respect level for circus performers and to show the world how talented they are.”  As for the latter part, I think the world knows.  As for the former, well, Christian, there ARE shows out there that do foster first line respect for tanbark talent like yours, and I don’t have to name them.  They tend to separate artist from huckster...

BEAR WITH ME...  Did you know — yes, YOU, now reading me, that a bear can, if it has to, walk like a human under its own volition?  So take that, PETA!  Evidence on a TV news novelty shows a bear ambling on all twos through the mild wilds, the reason being that it had hurt or injured its front paws and evolved itself over night from horizontal to vertical.  I was tickled pink at the spectacle.  ... Lot-combing Lane Talburt You-tubing a video essay on fire eater Lamount, the “Human Volcano” with Kelly Miller.  Lamount, evidently oblivious to PR imagery,  reveals that, of a slate of chores on his job description,  “the smallest chore is performing.” Here is where a crack publicist might have suggested  something a little less  less ordinary.  ... Now let’s follow a thread: Christian talking about disrespect for the artist, a nice thematic tie in to Lamunt’s embarrassing disclosure.  Another thread, my dread of photos that show a sea of empty seats, thickens in the Talbert You Tube: He filmed the Human Volcano exhaling fire into a  virtually empty tent, during an actual performance.  No comment.

OFF THE LOT, ACROSS THE STREET: Well, not a bad show back there. A few people in the seats.  Some good acts ... I’m riding high, fearing I’ll crash soon on the Oakland A’s (a baseball team), inevitably tanking after premature triumph.  Those long seasons can be so punishing ... Did you thrill to Phil last Sunday, number one on the greens for a moment, ball to ball down the finish with Rory — what a player!  You don’t think he’s, what?  Ooops, my bus!  Early this time!  Okay, yeah!  Give me a call! .....

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